Eat That Frog: Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time... Part 2

In the blog on Wednesday (February 22, 2017), I introduced the basic concept of the book Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time by Brian Tracy.

Continuing on... How do you create the daily prioritized list of tasks?

In order to do so, I ask myself, "Which is the one activity that if I did in an excellent and timely fashion would have the greatest positive impact on the project as a whole or my life?" Thus, I use long-term consequences to make my near-term decisions.

The thing that I, personally, have been and continue to be guilty of is that I'm tempted to clear up the small things first. The thinking is that these are things that I can finish up quickly and that will make me feel accomplished and on top of things. Whereas the reverse is true. Time management is really life management, and while I am free to choose what to spend my time on, my ability to choose between important and unimportant things will determine my successes day-to-day and in the long-term.

Identifying the key constraints of all the tasks also determines the order of execution of the tasks. Say, I'm waiting for something to be delivered to me by someone else before I can start on my part of the project, then I can schedule that task for the afternoon instead of first thing in the morning, even if, it is the most important thing on my list for that day. In this case, the ugly morning frog will have to be the ugliest of all the frogs in my control and not dependent upon others.

An important determiner of the order of tasks is my assessment of my daily health and special needs. Say, my energy levels always flag around 10 o'clock and pick up after lunch at 1 o'clock. Well, then the ugliest frogs are set for the first half of the morning, unimportant tasks for mid-morning, and the lesser frogs for early afternoon.

Sometimes a project is too large and unwieldy to be tackled in one big chunk. So after it is broken down in various sub-tasks, the sub-tasks can be sequenced in order to get the whole project done.

These are some of the ways in which to develop a prioritized list of tasks to do on a daily basis.

One thing to remember is to unitask, that is, focus on only one task at time, and finish it before moving on to the next task on the list. See the blog on Monday (February 20, 2017) to learn how and why unitasking is better than multitasking.

Another thing to remember is to "develop a sense of urgency in everything you do," according to Brian Tracy. Once you start a task, develop the habit of working immediately and fast on it.

The unitasking and fast action help in achieving a task quicker with higher quality. It results in a great sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.

So remember: Eat That Frog every single morning!

Eat That Frog: Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time... Part 1

This blog is about the book Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time by Brian Tracy.

Eat That Frog! refers to the Mark Twain mantra: "Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day."

According to Tracy: "Your frog is your biggest, most important task of the day, the one you're most likely to procrastinate on. It is also the one task that can have the greatest possible impact on your life and results at the moment. [So] tackle your major task first thing each morning before you do anything else and without taking too much time to think about it. If you have to eat two frogs, eat the ugliest one first."

The way I interpret this is that I should plan my day in advance (say, the night before or at the start of the day) by creating and typing up a prioritized list of tasks I want to get done that day.

"There is never enough time to do everything, but there is always enough time to do the most important thing." So the first thing I tackle the next day morning is either the most significant task and/or the most 'procrastinable' task. The latter is the task that I'm most reluctant to get done—it might be something I have been putting off for days. So getting that done and out of the way in the morning itself will take the pressure off from the rest of my day.

"Whenever you complete a task of any size or importance, you feel a surge of energy, enthusiasm, and self-esteem," says Brain Tracy. "The more important the completed task, the happier, more confident, and more powerful you feel about yourself and your world. The ability to concentrate single-mindedly on your most important task, to do it well, and to finish it completely, is the key to great success, achievement, respect, status, and happiness in life."

Who wouldn't want these feel-good endorphins first thing in the morning? Especially when, I don't have to have burning pain in my legs or heaving sides to get it? Frog legs for the win! Bon Appétit!

Unitasking Instead of Multitasking is the New Way to Work

I shall be doing a short series of productivity blogs this week. These blogs aren't new—they're from May 2013—but their currency hasn't waned yet.

The buzzword of the late 1990s and 2000s was multitasking. Everyone wanted to be multitasking or wanted it bruited about that they were efficient multitaskers.

But the key question these high achievers failed to ask was: Were they effective as multitaskers? That is, at the end of the day, given the same set of tasks, did the multitaskers or the unitaskers achieve more in terms of quality and quantity?

Has this ever happened to you? You're reading a document, when it suddenly reminds you of the email your friend sent to you yesterday that you hadn't replied to, so you open your email program, only to find two high priority emails from your boss that you start answering, only to be interrupted by your co-worker calling you for lunch. And so your mid-morning goes, by the end of which, all you've achieved is a meal.

Behavior and social scientists now believe that constant context-switching between various tasks causes people to be less effective overall. For something like walking and chewing gum, multitasking works. For something like, writing a scene of your book with complex fight choreography and also having a protracted discussion via email on the minutiae of book contract negotiations, multitasking is counterproductive to achieving the milestones for either of the two tasks.

Every time you switch away from task one to task two, you have to reload all the details about task two in your mind before you can start working. Similarly, switching back to task one requires you to reload those set of details, and back and forth.

In Monk Mind, blogger Leo Babauta explodes the myth that multitaskers are getting more work done and are getting more satisfaction from that work, in terms of quality and sense of achievement.

So for the intellectually challenging tasks, tasks that require a lot of attention and care, tasks involving physical and emotional intimacy, etc., unitasking is to be lauded and actively pursued, because focusing on single tasks is the way to go in order to achieve success.

How do you go about focusing the mind on a single task? Take the case of writing an article for a magazine.

Clear Away Distractions

Close all email systems, browsers, and social media programs.

Turn off all notifications.

Disconnect your computer from the Internet.

Clear your desk of all pieces of paper except for those necessary for your selected task. As in the case of writing the article, you'll need your folder of research material, interview transcripts, and notes.

Leave only the programs open that are necessary for achieving your selected task. So for the article, perhaps you'll need the folder where you've saved your research and nascent article files and your word processing program.

Plug in headphones, whether you play music or not is up to you. Headphones cut out ambient sound and also signal to other people that Serious Work Is In Progress.

Now, do nothing but that one task.

Practice Doing One Thing

If you can't focus on one task for more than a few minutes, start out with small goals in the begining. Say, you'll work on your task for five minutes, then reward yourself by taking a one-minute break to read email. Slowly build up to ten minutes on, one minute off; and so on. Be sure to have a timer set so that you can accurately build this up. In his article, Leo writes, "Set up a positive feedback cycle for single-tasking focus, and you’ll reverse the years of training your mind has gotten to switch tasks."

Sounds overly simplistic? Give it a try. The mind is flexible and can be retrained.

In conclusion, Leo writes, "While a few years ago I couldn’t sit down to work on something without quickly switching to email or one of my favorite Internet forums or sites, today I can sit down and write. I can clear away distractions, when I set my mind to it, and do one thing. And that changes everything: you lose yourself in that task, become so immersed that you pour everything you have into the work, and it becomes a meditative, transformative experience. Your happiness increases, stress goes down, and [quality of] work improves."

An aside...

However, busy moms will still prize multitasking. For example, here's what writer Monica Trasandes wrote in the December 2012 issue of Real Simple: "Recently I found myself walking toward the kitchen with a load of laundry in my arms, two empty coffee cups dangling from my fingers, and car keys tucked between my chin and the clothes."

I think Trasandes is a lightweight. I'd have a book tucked under one arm, a purse dangling from that elbow, the mugs held in one hand, while an empty water bottle and a board game are firmly clasped in the other hand, in addition to the laundry and the keys.

10th Anniversary of This Blog!

Today, in 2006, I posted my first "Hello World!" blog and Cogitations & Meditations was born.

I had just recently joined the online bookish world. I was reading group author blogs, such as SquawkRadio and RiskyRegencies, and I had joined Eloisa James's message board. Through these blogs and boards, I came in touch with many authors, aspiring writers, and readers. MY PEOPLE! For the first time, reading stopped being a solitary hobby. Now, I had people with whom to discuss my books. What joy! What freedom!

Everyone was blogging then, so I decided to jump on the bandwagon. The first year, I logged all of TWO one-sentence blogs. Clearly, my bandwagon wasn't going very far. The next year was five—still barely moving. But I finally started it seriously in 2008 with 51. The next year, 2009, was a blockbuster year with 147!! I have never achieved those heights again nor do I aspire to. Last year wasn't too shabby with 111, but this year, the numbers are down and will stay down next year as well.

I used to publish five days a week in the beginning, but have since slowed down to once or twice a week, and sometimes, not even that. I used to have many comments in the beginning, but very few these days. However, I have enjoyed writing this blog so much that I have continued writing. As the Blogger stats indicate, people may not be commenting but they're reading.

Over the years, I have written more than 940 posts on writing, reading, the publishing history, world history, popular culture, conferences, and photography. I have also reviewed some books. In the beginning it used to be a writer's and editor's blog, but in the past couple of years, it has become a reader's blog. As my previous post indicated, I'll be rethinking and retooling the site to decide what sorts of posts to write. This will of course continue to very much be a bookish blog, after all that is its raison d'être, however the content may vary from years past.

I designed the site by hand-coding most of the details, and I'm in love with it, so expect to continue seeing the same look. I have updated the sidebar list of recommendations as my reading has expanded beyond Romance in recent years. So now I have a Romance list and a Non-Romance list that includes all other types of fiction, genre and general, and all types of non-fiction.

I have removed the section that included glimpses of my personal library from LibraryThing, because I'm debating what to do about LibraryThing itself. I have liked having a catalogue of all my books on there, however, as I've given books away, I have forgotten to update it, and so the catalog there is out-of-date and less useful than it used to be. Besides, there are hundreds of un-cataloged books in my house!

I freely admit to being a book hoarder. I gave away nine big boxes of books to my local public library earlier this summer, and yet there are thousands on the shelves that I cannot bear to part with. Clearly, another purge is warranted in 2017.

And so, this is a quiet celebration of my ten years of blogging. It's an achievement I'm proud of and one I've enjoyed very much. Onward ho to another ten!

Reading Goals for 2016 and the 10-Category Challenge from 2015

For a few years, I exclusively read romance. Then slowly, I started taking on other types of books. Last year, I decided to discover the reading world at large with a vengeance and to engage with it more.

So I took on the 10-Category Challenge once again. The original challenge was to read 10 books in 10 categories by October 10, 2010. I modified that to: read any number of books in 10 categories, other than romance, by December 31 to finish the challenge. The challenge has worked so well for me for the past few years that I've decided to keep it going every year. It has spurred me to step outside my comfort zone to attempt books I would not have otherwise tried reading. And I've been richly rewarded. (My list of 2015 challenge books is at the bottom of the post.)


Reading Goals For 2015

My reading goals for 2015 included: more non-romance, literary fiction, nonfiction, children's and YA fiction, poetry, and most importantly, more diversity. My diversity umbrella was pretty large: male authors, POC authors and characters, LGBTQ characters and authors, authors and characters with disabilities and challenges, non-Christian authors and characters, books in translation, and eBooks and audiobooks. In every which way I was trying to widen the scope of my reading beyond reading romance in print.


Reading Goals For 2016

I was struck by New Yorker writer Kathryn Schultz's piece on The Best Facts I Learned from Books in 2015. This is so true. You learn facts not just from nonfiction but also from superbly executed and researched fiction as well. And in the new year, I'm going to make it a point to talk about such facts and also ideas in my monthly reading round-ups.

I shall continue my quest for more diversity in my reading, along the same lines as described above. I'm also looking forward to reading more poetry and more regularly as well as reading a few plays. I also want to be more conscious of reading books by/with POC, LGBTQ, non-Christian authors/characters and those with disabilities and challenges. Among children's books, I shall be recording the picture books I read, too; however, not the 38743 times I read each book. I really need to beef up my reading in the Parenting, Writing, and Life Skills categories in 2016. Chop! Chop!

I'm also going to venture into audiobooks in a big way, at least one a month. My toe-dipping into audiobooks in 2015 was very successful. And while I don't record romance books in the 10-Category Challenge, my reading goal for 2016 is going to include participation in #SuperYear, trying to read one Harlequin Super Romance every month.

I shall also continue to participate in Wendy Crutcher's TBR Challenge where on every third Wednesday of the month, I'll comment on a book from the TBR on my blog. I try to follow Wendy's monthly themes but since my goal is to read non-romance books, my books don't always fall in the same categories.

Due to various reasons, I have reduced the number of books I buy and I read almost exclusively from the library. My many reasons include supporting our excellent library system by borrowing books and by requesting they stock in-demand new books. I also hold them accountable for supplying enough copies of those books and for stocking new releases as close to the release date as possible. In return, we donate money and books generously every year to the library.


Non-romance Reading Categories for 2016

Literary Fiction, In Translation
Detective, Mystery, Suspense, Crime, Thriller
Children's & Young Adult
Poetry & Plays
Biographies & Memoirs
Writing, Parenting, Life Skills
General Nonfiction
Audiobooks, e-Books
POC, LGBTQ, Non-Christian, Disabilities & Challenges
Male Writers


10-Category Challenge Books for 2015

Literary Fiction
—"North & South" by Elizabeth Gaskell
—"The Travelling Parsi" by Kamal Sunavala
—"The Art Forger" by B.A. Shapiro
—"The Bookman's Tale" by Charles Lovett
—"The Rosie Project" by Graeme Simsion
—"Miss Cayley's Adventures" by Grant Allen
—"The Mill on the Floss" by George Eliot
—"The Great Wall of China" by Franz Kafka
—"Thrush Green" by Miss Read
—"The Nose" by Nikolai Gogol
—"The Warden" by Anthony Trollope
—"Butterflies in November" by Auður Ava Ólafsdóttir
—"Major Pettigrew's Last Stand" by Helen Simonson

Detective, Mystery, Suspense, Crime, Thriller
—"The Art Forger" by B.A. Shapiro
—"The Bookman's Tale" by Charles Lovett
—"Who Buries the Dead" by C.S. Harris
—"Pietr the Latvian (Inspector Maigret)" by Georges Simenon
—"Miss Cayley's Adventures" by Grant Allen
—"The Venetian Affair" by Helen MacInnes
—"Reykjavik Nights" by Arnaldur Indriðason
—"Cut to the Quick" by Kate Ross

Fantasy
—"The Alchemyst: The Secrets the Immortal Nicholas Flamel" by Michael Scott
—"A Wrinkle in Time" by Madeleine L'Engle
—"Truckers" by Terry Pratchett

Children's & Young Adult
—"The Alchemyst: The Secrets the Immortal Nicholas Flamel" by Michael Scott
—"Wonder" by R.J. Palacio
—"Brown Girl Dreaming" by Jacqueline Woodson
—"She Wore Red Trainers" by Na’ima bint Robert
—"A Wrinkle in Time" by Madeleine L'Engle
—"Truckers" by Terry Pratchett
—"Stargirl" by Jerry Spinelli
—"Six Cousins at Mistletoe Farm" by Enid Blyton
—"My Basmati Bat Mitzvah" by Paula Freedman

Poetry
—"Classic Love Poems" read by Richard Armitage
—"Brown Girl Dreaming" by Jacqueline Woodson
—"Poetry of Walt Whitman" edited by Jonathan Levin
—"Shadowskin" by Shveta Thakrar
—"A Partial History Of My Stupidity", "Branch Library", "Early Sunday Morning" by Edward Hirsch
—"Between the World and Me" by Richard Wright

General Nonfiction
—"Belle: The Slave Daughter and the Lord Chief Justice" by Paula Byrne
—"Slouching Towards Bethlehem" by Joan Didion
—"Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End" by Atul Gawande
—"Tropical Classical: Essays from Several Directions" by Pico Iyer
—"Citizen: An American Lyric" by Claudia Rankine
—"Between the World and Me" by Ta-Nehisi Coates
—"Inspire: A Volunteer Adventure Inspiration Book" by various authors

Biographies & Memoirs
—"The Travelling Parsi" by Kamal Sunavala
—"Making Masterpiece" by Rebecca Eaton
—"Without You, There Is No Us: My Time with the Sons of North Korea's Elite" by Suki Kim
—"I am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban" by Malala Yousafzai

Writing & Parenting
—"The Writer's Life: Insights from the Right to Write" by Julia Cameron
—*redacted* by Jan Faull

Life Skills
—"The One Skill: How Mastering the Art of Letting Go Will Change Your Life" by Leo Babauta
—"The Little Book of Contentment: a guide to becoming happy with life and who you are while getting things done" by Leo Babauta

Male Writers
—"The One Skill: How Mastering the Art of Letting Go Will Change Your Life" by Leo Babauta
—"The Alchemyst: The Secrets the Immortal Nicholas Flamel" by Michael Scott
—"Miss Cayley's Adventures" by Grant Allen
—"The Bookman's Tale" by Charles Lovett
—"The Little Book of Contentment: a guide to becoming happy with life and who you are while getting things done" by Leo Babauta
—"The Rosie Project" by Graeme Simsion
—"Pietr the Latvian (Inspector Maigret)" by Georges Simenon
—"Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End" by Atul Gawande
—"Truckers" by Terry Pratchett
—"Poetry of Walt Whitman" edited by Jonathan Levin
—"Stargirl" by Jerry Spinelli
—"The Great Wall of China" by Franz Kafka
—"Reykyavik Nights" by Arnaldur Indriðason
—"Tropical Classical: Essays from Several Directions" by Pico Iyer
—"A Partial History Of My Stupidity", "Branch Library", "Early Sunday Morning" by Edward Hirsch
—"The Nose" by Nikolai Gogol
—"Between the World and Me" by Richard Wright
—"Between the World and Me" by Ta-Nehisi Coates
—"The Warden" by Anthony Trollope

Happy New Year!

Every new year brings with it hope and excitement for me. It's a chance to wash away the regrets and unfinished projects from last year and start afresh. Everything is sparkling and clean and new. It's the best time of the year for me.

For last year's words belong to last year's language
And next year's words await another voice.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.
—T.S Eliot

Mission Statements, Life Lists, Goals, Schedules: define, design, discharge

Here are four of my posts that have proven to be among the most popular on this blog. They have all to do with architecting your life starting with small daily steps.

A Personal Mission Statement is a set of mottoes for your life that define the boundaries of who you are, what your deepest held beliefs are, how you interact with others, and what you think of yourself.

A Life List is a mondo-beyondo list of your life's dreams. There are no limits as to how many items there can be on this list. It's a personal list, so don't be shy of wishing for the most outrageous, the most selfish, the most greedy, the most anything. Every deeply held desire needs to be on this list. Don't compromise on your dreams.

Goals Making and Keeping and committing to bringing your resolutions to fruition. Goals give you something concrete to work towards and to measure progress against. Goals also give you a sense of accomplisment once you've reached them.

Scheduling Your Life is important, because if you don't label your time to dedicated actions, then that piece of time is either attached to another task or frittered away. The most basic rule of thumb when keeping to a schedule is: There is no making up lost time.

Resolute About Resolving Your Resolutions

Are you resolute about resolving your new year's resolutions this year? Here are some tips to help you on your way that have helped me tremendously. This blog is a repeat from January 2013.

Don't make generalized resolutions, such as "Be Happy." Instead make specific, measurable ones, such as "Do a yoga retreat in Hawaii over the summer"—you can measure whether you achieved this goal or not and how you felt about it.

By all means, make smaller sub-goals with deadlines that will keep the bigger goal on track to being finished.

Work on only one habit at a time. Say, in January, you'll work on X and on Y in February.

Start with the smallest, easiest habit first. And do it just for a few minutes once a day. Feeling a sense of accomplishment from the very start is what keeps the habit of habit-forming (heh!) going.

And the first step in starting a habit is to simply start. Inertia, procrastination, a feeling of being overwhelmed can all lead to a tendency to want to only imagine you having the habit, but afraid to start the work in forming the habit. So, just start!

Write it down. Well, the mind's not good about keeping everything in the foreground. Old things often get pushed into the background, even though when the thoughts first came in, they were deemed high priority. We forget; we fall into old habits by, well, habit; new issues crop up that require our immediate attention; we're tired so we say we'll do it tomorrow; etc.

Accountability is the sticky glue that binds us to our resolutions on paper. If you have to report in to a friend or a group of like-minded individual or even to your online journal, it serves as a reasonably pressured deadline that has to be achieved.

Don't have only negative or "you-must"s resolutions. Have fun ones as well, such as the yoga retreat mentioned above. If you plan only drudgery for the year, then it's guaranteed that your list of resolutions will have nary a checkmark. This is the main reason, I call them goals, not resolutions.

And the complementary one to the above is that you should feel free to abandon a resolution part-way through or even before beginning, if you feel that it's something that's never going to happen no matter how many years it shows up on your list. For me, that would mean giving up on reading Tolstoy's War and Peace in this life at least.

Revisit your list constantly to revise, add to, or subtract from the litany. It keeps the energy alive about what needs to be achieved next and it keeps the list fresh and current.

Unitasking: A New Way To Work

This is a blog from three years ago that is still just as relevant today as it was then.

The buzzword of the late 1990s and the 2000s was multitasking. Everyone wanted to be multitasking or wanted it bruited about that they're efficient multitaskers.

But the key question these high achievers failed to ask was: Were they effective as multitaskers? That is, at the end of the day, given the same set of tasks, did the multitaskers or the unitaskers achieve more in terms of quality and quantity?

Behavior and social scientists now believe that constant context-switching between various tasks causes people to be less effective overall. For something like walking and chewing gum, multitasking works. For something like, writing programming code for one software application and having a protracted discussion via email on another piece of software, multitasking is counterproductive to achieving milestones for either of the two tasks.

Every time you switch away from task one to task two, you have to reload all the details about task two in your mind before you can start working. Similarly, switching back to task one requires you to reload those set of details, and back and forth.

So for the intellectually challenging tasks, tasks that require a lot of attention and care, tasks involving physical and emotional intimacy, etc., unitasking is to be lauded and actively pursued.

Read what Leo Babauta has to say about Monk Mind and how to achieve single-task focus.

An aside: Busy moms will still prize multitasking. For example, here's what writer Monica Trasandes wrote in the December 2012 issue of Real Simple: "Recently I found myself walking toward the kitchen with a load of laundry in my arms, two empty coffee cups dangling from my fingers, and car keys tucked between my chin and the clothes."

I think Trasandes is a lightweight. I'd have a book tucked under one arm, a purse dangling from that elbow, the mugs held in one hand, while an empty water bottle and a board game are firmly clasped in the other hand, in addition to the laundry and keys.

2015 TBR Reading Challenge: The One Skill: How Mastering the Art of Letting Go Will Change Your Life by Leo Babauta

I know, I know, I know. I'm LATE! This is March's TBR Challenge book and it is now APRIL! In fact, April's book is due next week so I had to get the March one out of the way before then.

2015 TBR Reading Challenge
Book: The One Skill: How Mastering the Art of Letting Go Will Change Your Life by Leo Babauta
My Categories: nonfiction, male author, life skills
Wendy Crutcher's Category: Series Catch-Up (oops!)

The main thrust of Babauta's book is that "the root of many of our problems is our inability to let go." We tend to overthink situations and that combined with our resistance to letting go causes anxiety, frustration, depression, and anger over things that happen, might happen, and have happened to us. Letting go of the fear of failure, of wanting to control people and situations, of needing to go to distractions all day, and other such habits will lead to being better in control of self and life's problems. After detailing why we hold on to such habits, he details how you can practice the art of letting go.

I'm going to briefly sketch in his book here. You can download the entire book for free here.

There are two sections to this book: a) the factors that we don't let go and the resultant problems they cause and b) a step-by-step approach to letting go and the aftermath of letting go.

Procrastination
We procrastinate out of fear of failure or fear of a task being overwhelming or difficult. We build an ideal in our heads about how life will be successful and easy. So when there's a hint that things are not going to be that way, we avoid them.

Fear
Fear is the current underlying a lot of our unhappiness. For example, anxiety that something you want isn't going to happen, fear that you're not good enough, fear that others will judge you, fear of letting go of control of the other person in a relationship, fear of discomfort, or fear that you won't be able to accomplish all that you want to and how you want to. Problems are rooted in fear and fear is rooted in ideals.

People
Holding on to ideals of how everyone should act, which isn't reality, and wanting to control people so they will act in the "right" way is what causes anger, frustration, stress, and disappointment.

Distractions
Distractions are comfortable things that we're good at and won't fail at. The process of letting go of a distraction is to first see what appeal it has for you. Then notice the disadvantages it has for you, how it is hurting you, and the impermanence of it. Let go of the distraction for a day and see what positive things you can do to fill that void. Be grateful for the positivity you've invited into your life.

Change
We want things to stay the same, and yet they never do. This is why we suffer. Unfortunately, the constant and impermanent nature of change is reality. So see the impermanence as the freedom to reinvent yourself. The past matters, but we're not completely bound to it. You can start a new self.

Developing the Letting Go Skill
Noticing Signals: When you're holding on to something harmful, symptoms like anger, frustration procrastination, etc. show up. Learn to recognize the signals when they happen.

Seeing the Ideal: You have expectations of others, ideals for yourself, and ideals of how the world should be. This isn't reality. They're fantasies of what your reality should be. And that is what is causing the signals. So once you notice the signals, turn inward and try to locate the ideal you're holding on to.

(Of course, there are positive ideals that result in positive signals and bring positivity in your life. Hold on to them by all means and act on them. It's the negative ones that are being addressed here.)

Seeing the Harm: Acting on the negative signals or holding on to them can cause us unhappiness, prolong our stress, and harm our relationships with ourselves and with others.

Letting Go With Love: Letting go of the ideal or the expectation is a compassionate towards yourself. It's painful to let go of an ideal, because it is part of our makeup, but the benefit you'll receive after you've let go will be worth it.

Seeing Reality: Turn now to reality, see it as it is, accept this, and react calmly and appropriately to it.

What Letting Go Isn't
Babauta is at pains to explain how letting go isn't giving up, being a victim, not improving, letting someone else get away with something, letting the other person be right when they're wrong, giving up standards of common decency, etc. This is the charge that is always laid on life skills coaches when they talk of detachment. Acquiring a clear-eyed, emotionally-unclouded view of reality doesn't mean that you feel things less intensely, it just means you know how to manage your emotions and act appropriately.

Practice! Practice!
Get an accountability partner. Practice each of the mini-steps of Letting Go for 2-3 minutes every day. Journal about it. Report to your partner. Set up reminders for yourself so you don't forget to practice. At the end of the day, simply reading the book is not going to gain you a new skill. It's by practicing that you'll learn it.

Mission Statements, Life Lists, Goals, Schedules: define, design, discharge

Here are four of my posts that have proven to be among the most popular on this blog. They have all to do with architecting your life starting with small daily steps.

A Personal Mission Statement is a set of mottoes for your life that define the boundaries of who you are, what your deepest held beliefs are, how you interact with others, and what you think of yourself.

A Life List is a mondo-beyondo list of your life's dreams. There are no limits as to how many items there can be on this list. It's a personal list, so don't be shy of wishing for the most outrageous, the most selfish, the most greedy, the most anything. Every deeply held desire needs to be on this list. Don't compromise on your dreams.

Goals Making and Keeping and committing to bringing your resolutions to fruition. Goals give you something concrete to work towards and to measure progress against. Goals also give you a sense of accomplisment once you've reached them.

Scheduling Your Life is important, because if you don't label your time to dedicated actions, then that piece of time is either attached to another task or frittered away. The most basic rule of thumb when keeping to a schedule is: There is no making up lost time.

Resolute About Resolving Your Resolutions

Are you resolute about resolving your new year's resolutions this year? Here are some tips to help you on your way that have helped me tremendously. This blog is a repeat from last January.

Don't make generalized resolutions, such as "Be Happy." Instead make specific, measurable ones, such as "Do a yoga retreat in Hawaii over the summer"—you can measure whether you achieved this goal or not and how you felt about it.

By all means, make smaller sub-goals with deadlines that will keep the bigger goal on track to being finished.

Work on only one habit at a time. Say, in January, you'll work on X and on Y in February.

Start with the smallest, easiest habit first. And do it just for a few minutes once a day. Feeling a sense of accomplishment from the very start is what keeps the habit of habit-forming (heh!) going.

And the first step in starting a habit is to simply start. Inertia, procrastination, a feeling of being overwhelmed can all lead to a tendency to want to only imagine you having the habit, but afraid to start the work in forming the habit. So, just start!

Write it down. Well, the mind's not good about keeping everything in the foreground. Old things often get pushed into the background, even though when the thoughts first came in, they were deemed high priority. We forget; we fall into old habits by, well, habit; new issues crop up that require our immediate attention; we're tired so we say we'll do it tomorrow; etc.

Accountability is the sticky glue that binds us to our resolutions on paper. If you have to report in to a friend or a group of like-minded individual or even to your online journal, it serves as a reasonably pressured deadline that has to be achieved.

Don't have only negative or "you-must"s resolutions. Have fun ones as well, such as the yoga retreat mentioned above. If you plan only drudgery for the year, then it's guaranteed that your list of resolutions will have nary a checkmark. This is the main reason, I call them goals, not resolutions.

And the complementary one to the above is that you should feel free to abandon a resolution part-way through or even before beginning, if you feel that it's something that's never going to happen no matter how many years it shows up on your list. For me, that would mean giving up on reading Tolstoy's War and Peace in this life at least.

Revisit your list constantly to revise, add to, or subtract from the litany. It keeps the energy alive about what needs to be achieved next and it keeps the list fresh and current.

Resolute About Resolving Your Resolutions

Are you resolute about resolving your new year's resolutions this year? Here are some tips to help you on your way that have helped me tremendously. This blog is a repeat from last January 1.

Don't make generalized resolutions, such as "Be Happy." Instead make specific, measurable ones, such as "Do a yoga retreat in Hawaii over the summer"—you can measure whether you achieved this goal or not and how you felt about it.

By all means, make smaller sub-goals with deadlines that will keep the bigger goal on track to being finished.

Work on only one habit at a time. Say, in January, you'll work on X and on Y in February.

Start with the smallest, easiest habit first. And do it just for a few minutes once a day. Feeling a sense of accomplishment from the very start is what keeps the habit of habit-forming (heh!) going.

And the first step in starting a habit is to simply start. Inertia, procrastination, a feeling of being overwhelmed can all lead to a tendency to want to only imagine you having the habit, but afraid to start the work in forming the habit. So, just start!

Write it down. Well, the mind's not good about keeping everything in the foreground. Old things often get pushed into the background, even though when the thoughts first came in, they were deemed high priority. We forget; we fall into old habits by, well, habit; new issues crop up that require our immediate attention; we're tired so we say we'll do it tomorrow; etc.

Accountability is the sticky glue that binds us to our resolutions on paper. If you have to report in to a friend or a group of like-minded individual or even to your online journal, it serves as a reasonably pressured deadline that has to be achieved.

Don't have only negative or "you-must"s resolutions. Have fun ones as well, such as the yoga retreat mentioned above. If you plan only drudgery for the year, then it's guaranteed that your list of resolutions will have nary a checkmark. This is the main reason, I call them goals, not resolutions.

And the complementary one to the above is that you should feel free to abandon a resolution part-way through or even before beginning, if you feel that it's something that's never going to happen no matter how many years it shows up on your list. For me, that would mean giving up on reading Tolstoy's War and Peace in this life at least.

Revisit your list constantly to revise, add to, or subtract from the litany. It keeps the energy alive about what needs to be achieved next and it keeps the list fresh and current.

Mission Statements, Life Lists, Goals, Schedules: define, design, discharge

Here are four of my posts that have proven to be among the most popular on this blog. They have all to do with architecting your life starting with small daily steps.

A Personal Mission Statement is a set of mottoes for your life that define the boundaries of who you are, what your deepest held beliefs are, how you interact with others, and what you think of yourself.

A Life List is a mondo-beyondo list of your life's dreams. There are no limits as to how many items there can be on this list. It's a personal list, so don't be shy of wishing for the most outrageous, the most selfish, the most greedy, the most anything. Every deeply held desire needs to be on this list. Don't compromise on your dreams.

Goals Making and Keeping and committing to bringing your resolutions to fruition. Goals give you something concrete to work towards and to measure progress against. Goals also give you a sense of accomplisment once you've reached them.

Scheduling Your Life is important, because if you don't label your time to dedicated actions, then that piece of time is either attached to another task or frittered away. The most basic rule of thumb when keeping to a schedule is: There is no making up lost time.

Advice for Emerging Writers

"Emerging writer" is a much nicer term than "aspiring writer," isn't it?

The Missouri Review recently published a highly informative article on advice for emerging writers. I thought it very pertinent to my blog here, so I'm listing some of the points the article made. Do read the article in its entirety for all the details.

You're Talented, but Talented is Overrated — It's not enough to be talented. In fact, talent merely puts you in the "emerging writers" pool. It's consistent hard work that puts you in the "published writers" pool. E.L. Doctorow once sais, "Planning to write is not writing. Outlining, researching, talking to people about what you’re doing, none of that is writing. Writing is writing."

Ignore the Clock — Anyone can publish. So publishing should not be your goal, but publishing your best work should be your goal. No one is truly waiting for your masterpiece, so take the time to make your manuscript the best it can be.

Don’t Wait to be Told When to Write — Make the time to write a priority. It's not easy to find the time with our various work, house, and family responsibilities tearing us in different directions. So schedule a specific time every day and guard it with your life against disruptions.

Read More Books — Sounds obvious, right? You read to learn how to write. But how many writers still read? Very few, you'll find. They're too busy writing. However, you need outside input to add stimulus to your imagination and growth as a writer.

You Need at least Three Professional Mentors — Guidance from established writers is gold. They can point out to know what you didn't know you don't know and how to go about learning it. They can help with problem-solving and general advice on career advancement.

Explaining The Pomodoro Technique In Short

Life is a Vine of Tomatoes...

The goals of The Pomodoro Technique, a time management system by Francesco Cirillo, are to "eliminate the anxiety of time" and to "enhance focus and concentration."

"The Pomodoro Technique is based on the achievement of incremental objectives, one at a time, and on the development of a pleasant way to systematically observe, track, and evaluate time [spent] to enable self-improvement." In other words, it helps to banish the productivity lag introduced by the myth of multitasking goodness by focusing on one task at a time, finishing it and only then moving on to the next task, and improving your time and quality of work the next time you do the same or similar task.

Before I begin explaining the system, here are some handy-dandy worksheets that you'll need: the Cheat Sheet, a To Do Today list and a Activity Inventory list.

Task Allotment

Choose a time period, such as a week. Write down all the activities that you want to accomplish in that week on the Activity Inventory list. Then every morning, select the tasks you need to complete that day, and write them down on the To Do list. Three-quarters of the way down that list, create a heading called "Unplanned & Urgent" for activities that show up as interruptions.

The Basics

This is how it works. You set a 25-minute timer and start working on the first task on your To Do list. At 25 minutes, when the timer rings, stop working, and take a break for five minutes. This was one Pomodoro. Once your break is over, reset the timer for 25 minutes, and start work on your second Pomodoro. After four Pomodoros, a Pomodoro set, take a longer break of 30 minutes.

Recording

Put an "X" next to the task for every Pomodoro it takes to complete it. For weekly self-assessment purposes, create a table where you write down the date, the category of task, the name of the task, and how many Pomodoros it took to achieve the task. This way, you can assess how long it takes you to complete tasks of a certain category, tasks of a certain type, individual tasks, etc. It also allows you to then set new goals for time and quality improvements on recurring tasks.

Some Details

If you finish the first task in the middle of a Pomodoro, either go over the first task or start the second task on the list and continue working till the Pomodoro rings. A Pomodoro is indivisible, so you cannot further break it down. Once you start working on a Pomodoro, the timer has to ring; you cannot stop halfway through. (More on interruptions later.) Make sure the break is a relaxing one, and not something where you start an engrossing task that will spill over into the time for the next Pomodoro. Once you begin your first Pomodoro, you have to steadily continue working throughout the day, barring interruptions.

Interruptions

Internal interruptions occur when you remember a new task that needs to be completed or you get the sudden urge to raid the fridge or you start dreaming of that beach vacation you'd like to have some day, etc. When you realize that you're interrupting your Pomodoro, put an "apostrophe" next to the task on the To Do list. Then continue working on your original task. If new task needs to be done that day, add it to the section called Unplanned & Urgent Tasks of the To Do list, otherwise add it to the Activity Inventory list. After you've completed the first task, you can then choose to pick up this new task to do.

External interruptions occur when you get a phone call, someone stops by with a question, etc. situations that occur in office-type environments. Every time this happens, address them as quickly and efficiently as possible, add a "hyphen" on the To Do list next to the original task, and continue working on it. Add the new tasks if any to the Unplanned & Urgent Tasks list or the Activity Inventory list.

Sometimes, interruptions have to be addressed in the moment with no regard to the original task. In that case, void the current Pomodoro, even if it was set to ring within a few minutes, do the urgent task, and restart your original task with a fresh Pomodoro. Remember, a Pomodoro is indivisible.

Recording cont.

At the end of the day, record how many internal vs. external interruptions occurred during the day. Over the week, reflect on whether the interruptions have a pattern and what can be done to minimize them. Sometimes, it's as simple as letting other people know that when you're working on a Pomodoro, you do not appreciate interruptions. They can come talk to you in the break after your four-Pomodoro set. Sometimes, it's a matter of self-discipline to ignore procrastinations. This acts as a carrot to get you to be more efficient with your time.

Estimations

Based on your one week's record, you should be able to estimate how many Pomodoros you'll need for the same or similar tasks next week. Based on your knowledge of other tasks and your capabilities, you can also estimate how many Pomodoros you'll need. So when you set up a daily To Do list, you can put the number of boxes of estimated Pomodoros next to each task. Then as you work through Pomodoros, put an "X" in each of the boxes. Interruptions are recorded as previously mentioned.

Recording cont.

So now, on the record sheet, you have estimated and real Pomodoros columns. What the estimation method does is that at the end of the second week, you can assess your ability to appraise a particular task. On which tasks did you overestimate the time required and for which ones did you underestimate the time required. Was it due to interruptions or simply the nature of the work? Do certain tasks at certain times of the day take you longer? Can you move them to a different spot in your day next week? As a result of this self-valuation, you improve your efficiency in task-time allocation for future tasks without sacrificing quality. At the same time, you gain insight into your capabilities and how you work.

Adjuncts

The Pomodoro method has been integrated with several productivity applications. For example, Kanban Flow uses the technique to improve your focus, to time track tasks, and to track and measure any interruptions to your focus.

You can participate in mutual online support with other folks who're trying out the technique at Pomodoro World and My Tomatoes, or you can sync up with fellow enthusiasts at meetups and conferences via the Pomodoro Technique site.

If you're into cool gadgets and apps, the Pomodoro Technique site offers Pomodoro timers and the company Gigaom offers free online timers.

One of the downsides of The Pomodoro Technique is that the efficiency and improved quality of work gained as a result of applying the system will only continue if the method is followed as described. Taking shortcuts or license from prescribed rituals will diminish the benefits.

Do read the full book by Francesco Cirillo available as a free PDF download.

Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time ...Part 2

In the blog on Monday, May 27, 2013, I introduced the basic concept of the book Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time by Brian Tracy.

Continuing on... How do you create the daily prioritized list of tasks?

In order to do so, I ask myself, "Which is the one activity that if I did in an excellent and timely fashion would have the greatest positive impact on the project as a whole or my life?" Thus, I use long-term consequences to make my near-term decisions.

The thing that I, personally, have been and continue to be guilty of is that I'm tempted to clear up the small things first. The thinking is that these are things that I can finish up quickly and that will make me feel accomplished and on top of things. Whereas the reverse is true. Time management is really life management, and while I am free to choose what to spend my time on, my ability to choose between important and unimportant things will determine my successes day-to-day and in the long-term.

Identifying the key constraints of all the tasks also determines the order of execution of the tasks. Say, I'm waiting for something to be delivered to me by someone else before I can start on my part of the project, then I can schedule that task for the afternoon instead of first thing in the morning, even if, it is the most important thing on my list for that day. In this case, the ugly morning frog will have to be the ugliest of all the frogs in my control and not dependent upon others.

An important determiner of the order of tasks is my assessment of my daily health and special needs. Say, my energy levels always flag around 10 o'clock and pick up after lunch at 1 o'clock. Well, then the ugliest frogs are set for the first half of the morning, unimportant tasks for mid-morning, and the lesser frogs for early afternoon.

Sometimes a project is too large and unwieldy to be tackled in one big chunk. So after it is broken down in various sub-tasks, the sub-tasks can be sequenced in order to get the whole project done.

These are some of the ways in which to develop a prioritized list of tasks to do on a daily basis.

One thing to remember is to unitask, that is, focus on only one task at time, and finish it before moving on to the next task on the list. See the blog on May 20, 2013 to learn how and why unitasking is better than multitasking.

Another thing to remember is to "develop a sense of urgency in everything you do," according to Brian Tracy. Once you start a task, develop the habit of working immediately and fast on it.

The unitasking and fast action help in achieving a task quicker with higher quality. It results in a great sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.

Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time ...Part 1

I've blogged about the book Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time by Brian Tracy before. Lately, I picked up the book again and felt motivated to re-do my previous blog on it with added new information.

Eat That Frog! refers to the Mark Twain mantra: "Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day."

According to Tracy: "Your frog is your biggest, most important task of the day, the one you're most likely to procrastinate on. It is also the one task that can have the greatest possible impact on your life and results at the moment. [So] tackle your major task first thing each morning before you do anything else and without taking too much time to think about it. If you have to eat two frogs, eat the ugliest one first."

The way I interpret this is that I should plan my day in advance (say, the night before or at the start of the day) by creating and typing up a prioritized list of tasks I want to get done that day.

"There is never enough time to do everything, but there is always enough time to do the most important thing." So the first thing I tackle the next day morning is either the most significant task and/or the most 'procrastinable' task. The latter is the task that I'm most reluctant to get done—it might be something I have been putting off for days. So getting that done and out of the way in the morning itself will take the pressure off from the rest of my day.

"Whenever you complete a task of any size or importance, you feel a surge of energy, enthusiasm, and self-esteem," says Brain Tracy. "The more important the completed task, the happier, more confident, and more powerful you feel about yourself and your world. The ability to concentrate single-mindedly on your most important task, to do it well, and to finish it completely, is the key to great success, achievement, respect, status, and happiness in life."

Who wouldn't want these feel-good endorphins first thing in the morning? Especially when, I don't have to have burning pain in my legs or heaving sides to get it? Frog legs for the win! Bon Appétit!

Unitasking Instead of Multitasking is the New Way to Work

I shall be doing a short series of productivity blogs here next.

I have blogged on Monk Mind: How to Increase Your Focus by Leo Babauta before. I'm combining those previous posts into one here.

The buzzword of the late 1990s and 2000s was multitasking. Everyone wanted to be multitasking or wanted it bruited about that they were efficient multitaskers.

But the key question these high achievers failed to ask was: Were they effective as multitaskers? That is, at the end of the day, given the same set of tasks, did the multitaskers or the unitaskers achieve more in terms of quality and quantity?

Has this ever happened to you? You're reading a document, when it suddenly reminds you of the email your friend sent to you yesterday that you hadn't replied to, so you open your email program, only to find two high priority emails from your boss that you start answering, only to be interrupted by your co-worker calling you for lunch. And so your mid-morning goes, by the end of which, all you've achieved is a meal.

Behavior and social scientists now believe that constant context-switching between various tasks causes people to be less effective overall. For something like walking and chewing gum, multitasking works. For something like, writing a scene of your book with complex fight choreography and also having a protracted discussion via email on the minutiae of book contract negotiations, multitasking is counterproductive to achieving the milestones for either of the two tasks.

Every time you switch away from task one to task two, you have to reload all the details about task two in your mind before you can start working. Similarly, switching back to task one requires you to reload those set of details, and back and forth.

In Monk Mind, blogger Leo Babauta explodes the myth that multitaskers are getting more work done and are getting more satisfaction from that work, in terms of quality and sense of achievement.

So for the intellectually challenging tasks, tasks that require a lot of attention and care, tasks involving physical and emotional intimacy, etc., unitasking is to be lauded and actively pursued, because focusing on single tasks is the way to go in order to achieve success.

How do you go about focusing the mind on a single task? Take the case of writing an article for a magazine.

Clear Away Distractions

Close all email systems, browsers, and social media programs.

Turn off all notifications.

Disconect your computer from the Internet.

Clear your desk of all pieces of paper except for those necessary for your selected task. As in the case of writing the article, you'll need your folder of research material, interview transcripts, and notes.

Leave only the programs open that are necessary for achieving your selected task. So for the article, perhaps you'll need the folder where you've saved your research and nascent article files and your word processing program.

Plug in headphones, whether you play music or not is up to you. Headphones cut out ambient sound and also signal to other people that Serious Work Is In Progress.

Now, do nothing but that one task.

Practice Doing One Thing

If you can't focus on one task for more than a few minutes, start out with small goals in the begining. Say, you'll work on your task for five minutes, then reward yourself by taking a one-minute break to read email. Slowly build up to ten minutes on, one minute off; and so on. Be sure to have a timer set so that you can accurately build this up. In his article, Leo writes, "Set up a positive feedback cycle for single-tasking focus, and you’ll reverse the years of training your mind has gotten to switch tasks."

Sounds overly simplistic? Give it a try. The mind is flexible and can be retrained.

In conclusion, Leo writes, "While a few years ago I couldn’t sit down to work on something without quickly switching to email or one of my favorite Internet forums or sites, today I can sit down and write. I can clear away distractions, when I set my mind to it, and do one thing. And that changes everything: you lose yourself in that task, become so immersed that you pour everything you have into the work, and it becomes a meditative, transformative experience. Your happiness increases, stress goes down, and [quality of] work improves."

An aside...

However, busy moms will still prize multitasking. For example, here's what writer Monica Trasandes wrote in the December 2012 issue of Real Simple: "Recently I found myself walking toward the kitchen with a load of laundry in my arms, two empty coffee cups dangling from my fingers, and car keys tucked between my chin and the clothes."

I think Trasandes is a lightweight. I'd have a book tucked under one arm, a purse dangling from that elbow, the mugs held in one hand, while an empty water bottle and a board game are firmly clasped in the other hand, in addition to the laundry and keys.

Clutter? What Clutter? Get Rid of It!

When was the last time you last saw the surface of your desk?

At any point in time in the past, I'd have had the following on it: laptop, keyboard, docking station, wires running crazily helter-skelter, printer, loose computer paper, loose handwritten paper, notes for all current writing projects, a journal where I note down tasks and daily progress, my schedule and also a list of goals, water bottles, a mug of cold stale coffee, a can of coconut water, a bottle of lotion, my glasses, a pedometer, bills I need to take care of, and pens and pencils galore. If I had to eat at my desk, I'd have had to precariously perch the plate of food on top of some of this mess.

It's well and good to admire minimalist principles and to enjoy the idea that the gleaming wood of your desk will be available daily for your appreciation. But how on earth would you go about getting to that clean surface and then keep it that way?

Well, here's how...

Choose one small, self-contained area that's going to be your first clutter-free zone.

Ask yourself these questions: What is essential to this space? Are all the essentials coralled into logical groups? What are the things that you love but do not belong there? Where can they be moved to? Should everything that doesn't fall in the "essential" or "love" category get thrown out, or should it be revisited in a different part of the house?

Now set up boxes for donations, garbage bins, recycling bins, and the shredder in a readily accessible spot.

Start going through everything, item by item, in your chosen clutter-free area. File paper away in organized file folders, shred it, or recycle it. Put clothes away in the closet, donation box, or garbage bin. And so on. Make sure every single item in that area is looked at, thought over, and dealt with in some fashion. That area should now be well-organized and have fewer things per square inch of real estate than before.

Now that you've created your first clutter-free area, expand your clutter-free zone by taking over and organizing the adjacent area. And so on. Area by area, day by day, organize your entire home and office.

Next, and this is key, every time a new thing arrives in your clutter-free zone, make sure it is put away into the existing structure of organization, or moved to an appropriate area. Things should not simply land in the clutter-free zone with no rhyme or reason or organization. New things should always be put away in organized spots, as well as things that have been taken out for use should always be put back in their original spots.

This needs to become a habit, which will take time to develop—work on this habit consciously. The only way to get a habit to stick is to do it every single day.

Some areas are prone to clutter: mud rooms, kitchen islands, etc. Know these habits of yours and your family's. And make it point to, say, once a day before going to bed, clear out these areas, so that in the morning, the day begins on a tidy note.